Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Guest Post for Life After Dark Photography's Blog - Boudoir As Self-Validation

This is a guest post I wrote for a friend and client, Helen Edwards of Life After Dark Photography on her photography blog. Originally published April 19, 2016.

When I went in for my boudoir shoot, I had just broken up with my long term boyfriend and my Mom, who I am very close with, had just been diagnosed with non-alcoholic liver disease. My boudoir shoot had been scheduled as a gift to said ex-boyfriend, but I decided to keep my spot as a birthday gift to myself. I struggled with eating disorders for years when I was a teen, so for me this shoot was both a celebration of a healthier me and mindset, and also an escape from having to constantly cope with something. It was one day that would be purely about me looking confident, sexy and WORTHY. 

My life has undergone many other changes since then - I fell in love with someone who values me. I started my own business. I started writing again, even though I stopped years ago believing I wasn't any good at it. I moved into my own place. I bought two cars. I made an entire new group of friends who never make me feel like I'm competing for their attention. My Mom is in remission. I started going to cooking classes and floral classes. I started eating gluten-free and for the first time ever I ordered dessert in a restaurant and DIDN'T share it!

Boudoir doesn't get the credit for these things. I have been successful this year because I worked hard, committed to positive choices and surrounded myself with fantastic people. But I also think it's true that human beings are creatures of habit, and learn by example. When you do one positive thing for yourself, it becomes easier to take other risks to better yourself. It becomes easier to believe that you can feel better, and that you can acheive the things you need to feel better. Practice makes perfect. I hear friends all the time say they want to do a boudoir shoot, but need to wait for a better time, they need to lose ten more pounds or wait till they're in a better mind set. I think, contrarily, that the perfect time for a boudoir shoot is when you need a pick me up. When you need to prove yourself wrong about your insecurities. When you need a reminder that you are worthy of investing in.

The best part is that if you hit a wall, you have photographic evidence of how capable you are of happiness and beauty - Who can argue with that?

Written by Cassidy vander Ros, Marketing Maven and Administrative Super Hero to Photographer Helen Edwards
Life After Dark Photography
"Be art."

Thank you for reading! Don't forget to visit Helen at www.lifeafterdark.ca! :)

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